Know your worth.
This phrase know your worth sounds simple. Know your worth. And when you look at it, it seems easy to understand. I don’t doubt that people know what It means. But, there is a difference, there’s big difference between understanding what it means and actually incorporating it into your life.
Know your worth. What are you worth? It really boils down to understanding what you think you deserve. Look in the mirror and ask yourself this question: What do I deserve? I’ve done this in the past. I’ve looked myself in the mirror and asked myself what I thought I deserved. To be honest, I didn’t think I deserved much, because I didn’t think I was worth much. This was during a time of active addiction when I didn’t really have any self-esteem, any self-confidence, any understanding of who I was as a person and what I could actually offer. So, when those things were on empty and I didn’t think I had anything to offer, I would obviously think I had no worth and no self-worth. I thought I didn’t deserve anything because they are interconnected. What you think you deserve is connected to what you think your worth.
If you answered that question, “What am I worth?”, by saying or thinking, “not much”, then you obviously don’t think you deserve much either. Because, like I said, those two are connected. What you think you deserve is connected to what you think you’re worth. Therefore, if you think you deserve more, then you will believe that you are worth more. At the same time, if you think you deserve less, then you will believe that you are worth less. You consider yourself worthless, you have no worth, no self-worth. This isn’t a personal attack on you if you feel this way, but more so me trying to bring it to light and to the forefront of your mind.
I say this because it afflicted me for so long. During my days of active addiction, and even after I got clean, I didn’t have any self-worth because I didn’t think I deserved anything. I didn’t deserve to be happy, I didn’t deserve to feel joy, I didn’t deserve to experience all that life had to offer. And when you have this feeling of not deserving much, that’s when you allow certain things to happen in our life that we wouldn’t normally allow.
For example, you’ll allow someone to continuously do things to us or say things to you that are not right. But, you’re afraid if you stand up for yourself, if you express how you really feel, then this person might leave you or think that you aren’t good enough for them. So, instead of standing up for who you are because you know what you are worth, you allow other people, you give them permission to talk to you and treat you in a demeaning, belittling, or humiliating fashion. Because when you allow this person to act in such a disparaging way, you’re telling this person (even if it’s not verbally), that they can do whatever they want to you and you won’t do anything about it. You won’t leave or even try to defend yourself.
That is not right! That needs to stop at this very moment. You may not have truly understood your worth before, but that has to change. It’s all up to you to realize what you can offer, what you deserve, and in turn discover what you are worth. But it all starts with us, with me, and with you. You have to change our mindset, which means you have to change our perspectives, you have to change how you think of yourself, and how you talk about yourself. You have to believe that you deserve better and set a bar of standards that are non-negotiable, no matter what. It’s so important that you stand in your truth. That you understand who you are, your beliefs, what you stand for, and what your purpose is.
It’s really as simple as that. As human beings, we tend to complicate things in life, but to know your worth is essentially a simple concept. The hard part is incorporating it, believing it, and actually embodying it whole-heartedly in your life. That’s where you might want to resist or push back because within the process of growth is pain, struggle, and intense emotional releases. But, similar to many things in life, facing that pain, working through that struggle, and embracing those intense emotional release are where you figure out who you are. When you realize your strength, when you discover faith in something greater than yourself, when you find your self-confidence and self-esteem, then no one, not one person, can make you feel like you are worthless. No one can ever make you feel like you aren’t deserving of anything and everything in life that you desire or want to achieve.
You will no longer allow or give permission to that outside nonsense to penetrate you and the person that you’ve become. A strong, independent, self-confident person who knows their worth. And who knows what they deserve in this life.