For a long time, longer than I care to remember, I used to be afraid of the darkness. At first, it was the darkness outside of me. In certain rooms in my house, walking at night, or in the middle of the woods. But, as I got older and more used to that external darkness, I neglected, avoided, and ran from the darkness within me.
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From my own personal experience, that darkness, the one brewing and growing inside of me, was scarier and more terrifying than anything I ever encountered. Maybe you can relate to me, maybe you have no idea what I am talking about, but it was real to me.
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Being terrified of that darkness within me kept me in a bad place for many years, most of them against my will. You see, I didn’t know any different and thought that this darkness, this guilt, this shame, and embarrassment would always be something that made me ugly inside and out.
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But, that was my twisted thinking, my warped mindset that allowed me to believe that for too many years. Eventually, when I got clean and sober, and started to think clearer, I realized that that darkness wasn’t something I should run or shy away from. Instead, I should embrace it. I should try to understand it. And I should use it as a source of strength and motivation.
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Once I made that switch, my life was forever changed. I recognized that we all have dark and light within us and I wasn’t unique or special or being singled out. But, it’s what we do with that darkness when we know it needs to be dealt with. Do you see it for what it is and let it continue to control you OR do you do something about it?
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If I was you, I would choose the latter. You won’t regret it. I can absolutely promise you that.
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