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People Pleasing



At some point in every one’s life, we either did something that we didn’t want to do or we said something that we didn’t really mean. We may have even went against our own belief or our own values. So, then the question is: Why? Why do people say or do things that are not aligned with their true selves?


In my opinion and from personal experience, it has to do with someone longing to be liked, or more so, not disliked. It has to do with wanting so badly to feel accepted, or more so, not feeling left out. And therein lies the crux of this issue, the answer to that question. We are so afraid of feeling like we don’t belong, we are not worth it, or we don’t bring anything of value to the table, that we may say or do things just to feel accepted, just to be liked. We put this other person or persons wants and needs in front of our own. We sacrifice our mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health and well-being to make sure that others like us. That others find us funny, and cute, and pretty, or interesting.


This type of people pleasing behavior isn’t very conducive for anyone’s self-growth and evolution as a person. We need to take the time to really understand what we want, our passions and dreams, and what truly makes us happy. If we start to live this type of life, then we won’t need to go out of our way to try to please other people to feel liked or accepted. We will attract like-minded individuals that have the similar perspectives or views. This doesn’t mean we won’t or can’t have people in our company who disagree with us, but we’ll know that we don’t need to sacrifice our beliefs, our true selves, to make them like us. We can be our truest selves and the people who accept that will stick around and the ones who don’t can choose to move on.

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